I created an additional link, found here: Random Length's Player Bios, and also in the "Random Links" section on the right. Please update me on your bio questions as soon as you have the chance. Thanks.
Let me know if I made any mistakes or if you have any ideas on how we can make things better. Thanks again dudes.
Also, Pay Pott if you plan on playing next session.
Tuesday, September 29, 2009
Monday, September 28, 2009
SUMMER SESSION 2009 AWARDS
The following are awards voted on by the players of The Random Length's Hockey Club. All results are final.
For the first time we actually had a few ties - although regarding the Art Ross, the NHL rules stipulate three tiebreakers in case two or more players are tied in points:
1. Player with most goals.
2. Player with fewer games played.
3. Player scoring first goal of the season (not sure what this means).
So Curt actually won the Art Ross - but he sent both names over on the email so I left it how it was - plus I like to see my name in print.
Other than that, it looks like we had 1 first time winner and a couple repeat winners. Congratulations go out to Nordo for winning back-to-back Lady Byng awards. He is very gentlemanly.
Next session starts in the next few weeks. Pay Pott.
For the first time we actually had a few ties - although regarding the Art Ross, the NHL rules stipulate three tiebreakers in case two or more players are tied in points:
1. Player with most goals.
2. Player with fewer games played.
3. Player scoring first goal of the season (not sure what this means).
So Curt actually won the Art Ross - but he sent both names over on the email so I left it how it was - plus I like to see my name in print.
Other than that, it looks like we had 1 first time winner and a couple repeat winners. Congratulations go out to Nordo for winning back-to-back Lady Byng awards. He is very gentlemanly.
Next session starts in the next few weeks. Pay Pott.
Art Ross Trophy-Most points scored at the end of the session.
CURTIS CAROTHERS/TIM REGES
The Maurice Richard Trophy-Team's top goal scorer.
CURTIS CAROTHERS
Hart Memorial Trophy-Most Valuable Player to his team.
CURTIS CAROTHERS/TIM REGES
Vezina-Goalkeeper judged to be the best at his position.
JOHN SHOUP
James Norris Memorial Trophy-Team's best defensive player.
RYAN GOLD
Lady Byng-Player exhibiting the best sportsmanship and gentlemanly conduct.
NORDY SILJANDER/DAVE
Frank J. Selke Trophy-Defenseman who best excels in the offensive aspects of the game.
TRAVIS REGES
Saturday, September 26, 2009
Off Week: Check out this Video
This was posted on Pensblog, it's a solid piece of work bringing back some memories from the Civic/Mellon Arena. Definitely brought some chills. Mario's goal in the All-Star game - un-fucking-real.
Sunday, September 20, 2009
Game Recap 9/19/09 Playoffs Vs. Cougars
BUTLER (AP) - The Cougars don't need to give goalie "Looks like a Baby but is actually really old" much help these days. A strategical adjustment by 1 mohawk 0 girlfriends (1M0G) and a fortuitious shot provided exactly that.
1M0G's power-play goal early in the third period put the Cougars back in the lead and the Cougars had something to cheer about on a Saturday night for the first time in nearly five years, beating the Playoff snoozer Random Lengths 3-2.
"I'm afraid of grown men so I wear a helmet with a cage" scored the Cougars first goal, then set up 1M0G's game winner about 5 1/2 minutes into the final period with a cross-dek pass that 1M0G one-timed over goalie John Shoup's right shoulder.
"We switched me off the top power play unit because they were taking me away," 1M0G said, referring to a Random Length's defense that collapsed on him when he got the puck. "You would rather have me shooting. They did their homework. They allowed me to shoot the puck a lot and I missed 49 of 50 shots, but I found a way to sneak one in."
Random Length's coach Justin Pott preferred to call it a soft goal rather than a sneaky one.
"They got a lucky bounce and when you talk about soft goals, that was one you would call a soft goal," Pott said.
With Old Man Baby making 30 saves to win his fouth in a row, the Cougars ended a 0-5 winless playoff run since they last won there December 2, 2000.
Carothers returned again Saturday after missing one game with Flu-like symptoms, but was held without a goal for the first game this season.
"We've been trying to get on a roll," Old Man Baby said. "We almost let this team of scrubs beat us tonight. I mean, only 3 of their players play on two dek hockey teams! We can't lose to them. They don't love dek hockey as much as we do," he continued. "Look at our group of guys, there's only 3 guys on our team that DON'T play for 3 teams, and they at least play for two. They must have lives or something, I don't know," he concluded.
Tim Reges deflected a Brandon Fehl shot off of his foot to tie the game in the first, a rarity for a Random Length's team that normally does not score until mid-way through the second period.
"We had some good opportunities and the last couple of games we've been having a hard time finishing," said Length's forward Markie Reges, whose team has advanced past the first round of the playoffs only once. "We're creating a lot but not finishing."
The Length's were short-handed for the majority of the game. They also failed to generate any momentum after Tim Reges once again tied the score, this time at 2, when he converted a break-away late in the second.
The score may make the game seem closer than it actually was. If not for defensive mastery by "Who's this Dave?", Pott, Erock Reges, and Goldie this game could have been a lot worse than it was.
"I just love to play the game," Dave said. "And don't ask me how I keep my hat on my head because most of the time I don't even know. And NO, I do not use Bobby Pins!"
Shoup, who made a triumphant return last week from vacation, made 35 saves and was strong when the Cougars were on the power play. "It didn't go the way I would have liked it to go," Shoup said. "I don't think that's the best I can bring."
The Random Length's players tend to disagree. "He held us in the game when we were playing poorly and leaving him out to dry," Nordy Siljander said. "We continued to take penalties and Shoup stood tall. It would have been a much different game without Shoup backstopping us. Shoup somehow sees the play before it happens, it's amazing," Siljander concluded.
Tim Reges' 10th goal of the season tied the game in the second, and not long after Old Man Baby made the save of the night by throwing out his glove to stop Ryan Gold's shot into what looked to be an open net. Old Man Baby had a 1.92 goals-against average in winning each of his previous three starts, 1 in each league, and 3 just on this day.
1M0G put the Cougars up midway through the third with a wrist shot from between the circles that Shoup barely saw.
Notes: Random Length's leading scorer Curtis Carothers had an estimated 15 beers before the game...The Cougars scored a power play goal for the 18th in 19 games...The combined number of games played for each person on each team for the weekend - Random Length's - 13, Cougars - 76...Siljander, playing with a bruised foot, was also shut out for the game after scoring twice in his previous game.
1M0G's power-play goal early in the third period put the Cougars back in the lead and the Cougars had something to cheer about on a Saturday night for the first time in nearly five years, beating the Playoff snoozer Random Lengths 3-2.
"I'm afraid of grown men so I wear a helmet with a cage" scored the Cougars first goal, then set up 1M0G's game winner about 5 1/2 minutes into the final period with a cross-dek pass that 1M0G one-timed over goalie John Shoup's right shoulder.
"We switched me off the top power play unit because they were taking me away," 1M0G said, referring to a Random Length's defense that collapsed on him when he got the puck. "You would rather have me shooting. They did their homework. They allowed me to shoot the puck a lot and I missed 49 of 50 shots, but I found a way to sneak one in."
Random Length's coach Justin Pott preferred to call it a soft goal rather than a sneaky one.
"They got a lucky bounce and when you talk about soft goals, that was one you would call a soft goal," Pott said.
With Old Man Baby making 30 saves to win his fouth in a row, the Cougars ended a 0-5 winless playoff run since they last won there December 2, 2000.
Carothers returned again Saturday after missing one game with Flu-like symptoms, but was held without a goal for the first game this season.
"We've been trying to get on a roll," Old Man Baby said. "We almost let this team of scrubs beat us tonight. I mean, only 3 of their players play on two dek hockey teams! We can't lose to them. They don't love dek hockey as much as we do," he continued. "Look at our group of guys, there's only 3 guys on our team that DON'T play for 3 teams, and they at least play for two. They must have lives or something, I don't know," he concluded.
Tim Reges deflected a Brandon Fehl shot off of his foot to tie the game in the first, a rarity for a Random Length's team that normally does not score until mid-way through the second period.
"We had some good opportunities and the last couple of games we've been having a hard time finishing," said Length's forward Markie Reges, whose team has advanced past the first round of the playoffs only once. "We're creating a lot but not finishing."
The Length's were short-handed for the majority of the game. They also failed to generate any momentum after Tim Reges once again tied the score, this time at 2, when he converted a break-away late in the second.
The score may make the game seem closer than it actually was. If not for defensive mastery by "Who's this Dave?", Pott, Erock Reges, and Goldie this game could have been a lot worse than it was.
"I just love to play the game," Dave said. "And don't ask me how I keep my hat on my head because most of the time I don't even know. And NO, I do not use Bobby Pins!"
Shoup, who made a triumphant return last week from vacation, made 35 saves and was strong when the Cougars were on the power play. "It didn't go the way I would have liked it to go," Shoup said. "I don't think that's the best I can bring."
The Random Length's players tend to disagree. "He held us in the game when we were playing poorly and leaving him out to dry," Nordy Siljander said. "We continued to take penalties and Shoup stood tall. It would have been a much different game without Shoup backstopping us. Shoup somehow sees the play before it happens, it's amazing," Siljander concluded.
Tim Reges' 10th goal of the season tied the game in the second, and not long after Old Man Baby made the save of the night by throwing out his glove to stop Ryan Gold's shot into what looked to be an open net. Old Man Baby had a 1.92 goals-against average in winning each of his previous three starts, 1 in each league, and 3 just on this day.
1M0G put the Cougars up midway through the third with a wrist shot from between the circles that Shoup barely saw.
Notes: Random Length's leading scorer Curtis Carothers had an estimated 15 beers before the game...The Cougars scored a power play goal for the 18th in 19 games...The combined number of games played for each person on each team for the weekend - Random Length's - 13, Cougars - 76...Siljander, playing with a bruised foot, was also shut out for the game after scoring twice in his previous game.
Saturday, September 12, 2009
Game Recap 9/12 VS Sasse Blasters
Sasse Blasters? Who in God's name thinks of these names? Is it one person that gets to decide? It must be, because I know that if I were on that team and I asked the captain "hey man, what is our team name?" and he responded "The Sasse Blasters - funny right?" I would upper cut his scrotum.
Pott was there with his usual scouting report and according to him their goalie was not that great. Fehl on the other hand plays in the B(itch) league with some of these dudes, including the goalie, and he said he was pretty solid. If you find that information positive or helpful - you are a better man than I.
Their one threat was a guy who also plays in A(ss) league and B(ite me) league and he is not allowed to play forward because of it. Inside sources say this guy's wife is a skank - I'm guessing she's just pissed because this dude spends his entire weekend playing Dek Hockey. Oh well, he made me eat shit on a goal and had a pretty nice shot, but overall he was very "meh."
They scored the first goal on a rebound, and the scored stayed 1-0 for most of the first. The RLs did not fret though, and there were positive thoughts (mixed with BO and sweaty glove smell) floating around the bench.
Sure as shit Pott makes Skank Wife's Husband chew the boards and makes a sick pass across the dek to Fehl, who then makes an even sicker pass to Curtis who buries it. 1-1 - and then this ass clown breaks and tosses his stick at Aunt Pam.
Now I'm ok with tossing your stick, I throw golf clubs all of the time, but you DO NOT throw your stick at Aunt Pam. I have some other Aunts that I may be ok with with getting hit with a stick - but not Aunt Pam.
I called the King Joke out on it the next shift and I seriously didn't think I would be able to play the rest of the game when he responded to my comments. He told me to "go fuck myself." I have NEVER had anyone respond to a lewd comment by telling me to go fuck myself. I mean, WOW, if there was an award for the most hurtful come-back of all time - THIS IS IT! I immediately felt my soul frown and my heart sink into organ hell. My legs fell weak and my back hair starting falling out. Once I regained my composure I thought about his response once again and pooped myself a little. This guy made Andrew Dice Clay seem like Mother Theresa. I'm going to have nightmares for the next 3 months about me fucking myself...my knee just turned the opposite direction and my left nipple turned black just thinking about it again.
He did try to pull a move on me in his own zone minutes later and I stole it from him and all that he heard as I whizzed by was the Random Lengths patented "laaaater."
We scored the next goal. Curt made a nice play out of the corner to Pott who took a shot which was blocked by the defender and then proceeded to pop up in the air and Tim smacked it as it hit the ground and beat the goalie and we then led 2-1. Run-on I know, this is a game recap not your fucking senior project.
Fehl then scored twice on some nice setups by Curt and we were in the lead 4-1. It stayed this way for awhile, and the interim was clogged with penalties on both sides. 2 v 3s, 3 v 4s, 3 v 3s, Pott getting elbowed and then dragging a kid down to the ground, Dave tripping Sappy Slap Stick King Cumback because the kid was trying to stick handle and Dave felt bad that he was making himself look like an idiot, and Fehl got a 2 minute penalty for saying "what?"
Yeah, you guessed it - Heroin Ref was there and his usual "I need a stamp bag" self. You know how us as dudes, we have that one tool in our toolbox that we just cannot live without (mine is a roofers square)? That one tool that is the tool above all others. The King Tool. The Master Tool. You know what I mean? Well this guy is THAT tool in the Douche Bag Toolbox. He is KING TOOL.
They did end up making it an exciting game near the end and the boys played well. Pott and Dave were sucking air. Marky's assignment for the last minute and a half was to cover SWH (skank wife's husband) and he made some very important blocks at the point.
Shoup was his usual solid self and he made some key saves late. We held on for the win, a nice win.
Stats updated on the link to your right.
Game Highlights:
Pott was there with his usual scouting report and according to him their goalie was not that great. Fehl on the other hand plays in the B(itch) league with some of these dudes, including the goalie, and he said he was pretty solid. If you find that information positive or helpful - you are a better man than I.
Their one threat was a guy who also plays in A(ss) league and B(ite me) league and he is not allowed to play forward because of it. Inside sources say this guy's wife is a skank - I'm guessing she's just pissed because this dude spends his entire weekend playing Dek Hockey. Oh well, he made me eat shit on a goal and had a pretty nice shot, but overall he was very "meh."
They scored the first goal on a rebound, and the scored stayed 1-0 for most of the first. The RLs did not fret though, and there were positive thoughts (mixed with BO and sweaty glove smell) floating around the bench.
Sure as shit Pott makes Skank Wife's Husband chew the boards and makes a sick pass across the dek to Fehl, who then makes an even sicker pass to Curtis who buries it. 1-1 - and then this ass clown breaks and tosses his stick at Aunt Pam.
Now I'm ok with tossing your stick, I throw golf clubs all of the time, but you DO NOT throw your stick at Aunt Pam. I have some other Aunts that I may be ok with with getting hit with a stick - but not Aunt Pam.
I called the King Joke out on it the next shift and I seriously didn't think I would be able to play the rest of the game when he responded to my comments. He told me to "go fuck myself." I have NEVER had anyone respond to a lewd comment by telling me to go fuck myself. I mean, WOW, if there was an award for the most hurtful come-back of all time - THIS IS IT! I immediately felt my soul frown and my heart sink into organ hell. My legs fell weak and my back hair starting falling out. Once I regained my composure I thought about his response once again and pooped myself a little. This guy made Andrew Dice Clay seem like Mother Theresa. I'm going to have nightmares for the next 3 months about me fucking myself...my knee just turned the opposite direction and my left nipple turned black just thinking about it again.
He did try to pull a move on me in his own zone minutes later and I stole it from him and all that he heard as I whizzed by was the Random Lengths patented "laaaater."
We scored the next goal. Curt made a nice play out of the corner to Pott who took a shot which was blocked by the defender and then proceeded to pop up in the air and Tim smacked it as it hit the ground and beat the goalie and we then led 2-1. Run-on I know, this is a game recap not your fucking senior project.
Fehl then scored twice on some nice setups by Curt and we were in the lead 4-1. It stayed this way for awhile, and the interim was clogged with penalties on both sides. 2 v 3s, 3 v 4s, 3 v 3s, Pott getting elbowed and then dragging a kid down to the ground, Dave tripping Sappy Slap Stick King Cumback because the kid was trying to stick handle and Dave felt bad that he was making himself look like an idiot, and Fehl got a 2 minute penalty for saying "what?"
Yeah, you guessed it - Heroin Ref was there and his usual "I need a stamp bag" self. You know how us as dudes, we have that one tool in our toolbox that we just cannot live without (mine is a roofers square)? That one tool that is the tool above all others. The King Tool. The Master Tool. You know what I mean? Well this guy is THAT tool in the Douche Bag Toolbox. He is KING TOOL.
They did end up making it an exciting game near the end and the boys played well. Pott and Dave were sucking air. Marky's assignment for the last minute and a half was to cover SWH (skank wife's husband) and he made some very important blocks at the point.Shoup was his usual solid self and he made some key saves late. We held on for the win, a nice win.
Stats updated on the link to your right.
Game Highlights:
- Fehl's girlfriend was boozed up and she ordered us to win and we obliged. We need people to order us to win more often.
- We played the entire game with 4 forwards and 2 defenders and Pott and "Who's this Dave" played fucking fantastic.
- Shoup is by far the most improved Random Length since our inaugural session. We were giving them space for long shots because he was gobbling them up all night.
- Fehl has developed his sliding into an offensive advantage. Although he was thrown in the box for sliding into someone tonight. Dumb rule that was only created because some guy said he blew his knee out and then was playing again in two weeks. I have bruises, bumps, scrapes, and dents on my shins and legs every week - are you going to take the sticks away next?
- For the last 5 minutes RLs were taint deep and we pulled it out just in time.
- Pott name-dropped and Polamalu is out 8-9 weeks.
- Marky blocked 34 shots again.
- Happy Birthday Marky.
Game Recap 9/5
Sorry for the delayed recap for this game.
Solid overall. Tim scored two playing with Fehl. That line could have had 14 more goals if Tim could pass.
The Nordo and Marky line played awesome though, and Nord finished with two and Markie finished with one volley off of his knee deflecting Nordy's hardest shot of his life out of the corner.
Defense played well and the fill-in goalie Mike held his ground.
RL's win 5-2 in a late game.
Solid overall. Tim scored two playing with Fehl. That line could have had 14 more goals if Tim could pass.
The Nordo and Marky line played awesome though, and Nord finished with two and Markie finished with one volley off of his knee deflecting Nordy's hardest shot of his life out of the corner.
Defense played well and the fill-in goalie Mike held his ground.
RL's win 5-2 in a late game.
Thursday, September 3, 2009
UNFORTUNATE NEWS
This was forwarded to the team from Fennell:
Hello all,
I am sorry to inform everyone that we only had 5 teams registered in the league, so we will not be running another session of deck hockey this year. We will be running another one starting the end of April. We are also going to have a deck hockey tournament if anyone is interested, I believe that it will be the weekend of September 26th. If you would like any more information about the tournament, please let me know.
Thanks,
Troy MohneyFamily Sports Centercoachtroy@familysportscenter.org724-482-2199
ok, ok, ok - i can understand that they do not want to continue with the session because they only have 5 teams registered, I get that.
What I don't get is HOW IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THEY ONLY HAVE 5 TEAMS REGISTERED? Who is running this fiasco?! Out of the 100's of teams playing at the Township Dek, they could only get 5!! to register?? And this all for the same amount of money...
Boggles my mind. Better surface. More room. 5 v 5 like real hockey. Nicer boards. No communist, in-need of rehab, fat, taking their jobs too seriously refs. I don't see how it could be possible.
They should hire me to get teams to play in their league. It's like selling ketchup to a man with a cup full of plain fries (unless his name is Curt).
Joke league, unfortunate for us. Oh well, I guess we'll have to continue to put up with the Township.
Hello all,
I am sorry to inform everyone that we only had 5 teams registered in the league, so we will not be running another session of deck hockey this year. We will be running another one starting the end of April. We are also going to have a deck hockey tournament if anyone is interested, I believe that it will be the weekend of September 26th. If you would like any more information about the tournament, please let me know.
Thanks,
Troy MohneyFamily Sports Centercoachtroy@familysportscenter.org724-482-2199
ok, ok, ok - i can understand that they do not want to continue with the session because they only have 5 teams registered, I get that.
What I don't get is HOW IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THEY ONLY HAVE 5 TEAMS REGISTERED? Who is running this fiasco?! Out of the 100's of teams playing at the Township Dek, they could only get 5!! to register?? And this all for the same amount of money...
Boggles my mind. Better surface. More room. 5 v 5 like real hockey. Nicer boards. No communist, in-need of rehab, fat, taking their jobs too seriously refs. I don't see how it could be possible.
They should hire me to get teams to play in their league. It's like selling ketchup to a man with a cup full of plain fries (unless his name is Curt).
Joke league, unfortunate for us. Oh well, I guess we'll have to continue to put up with the Township.
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